Saturday, July 25, 2015


Wow... November 4th 2013 was the last time I was on this here blog...I can't believe it was that long! And it was missed! I stayed up-to-date with the DOC through facebook but this blog was always on my mind...when, why, how am I going to get back into it? Was this blog only going to share our first 5 years living with T1D? Was I done with it? Today I decided to get back into this amazing outlet of blogging.  I am working on a little clean up, a new look and a few changes and I hope to be writing, sharing and over sharing very soon. :) It really is overwhelming to sign in and see people are still clicking away...THANK YOU! and be back soon!!

Monday, November 4, 2013

A Photo- A- Day #4...PROUD

I started doing a photo- a- day for diabetes awareness month, brain child of Kerri at Six Until and today's prompt is #proud...which got me thinking of all the different things and kids I am proud off, a simple picture could not capture it. A blog post was needed to explain.

Last week Cara, our little running star in the making, our Olympian hopeful had a cross county meet.  She has been running with her siblings (blowing them out of the water btw) in order to train for this race.

My husband and I LIVE for these races, a chance for us to re-live our youth and a chance for us to celebrate our children's successes...what else does a parent need in life?!

We thought for sure, no problem top 5 again this year...easy...if not FIRST!  So when the field started to near the finish line and I did not see Cara in the front, my heart dropped.  I was soooo mad! and sad! and disappointed in her. She did not finish in the top 5, not even top poor girl was so ashamed of her placing she didn't tell us until that night what place she had finished in and my attitude towards her failure was not helping.  I  was so wrapped up in disappointment I missed the one thing I should have praised her for.  It was like all my hopes and dream for her were demolished in an instant, I over looked what she actually accomplished.

This shy, quiet 7 year old little girl finished her race, she did not give up, she kept on going.

She started that race with a blood sugar of 18.3mmol...if anything we failed her.  I don't even know, with a blood sugar of 18, she probably shouldn't have even been running. After hearing Dr Riddell speak this weekend about type 1 diabetes and exercise I realized the disadvantage she was handed while hanging out in the 18's during a race.  There is no way she could have performed to her optimal best.  She must have felt like POOP, complete poop...physically and emotionally because she was not able to do what she should have been able to do and it was because of something out of her control.

She wanted to quit, she wanted to walk right off that course and go home...but she didn't! AND I'M SO SO SO PROUD OF HER!

Each time these kids do something that pushes them, pushes them to accomplish something that allows them to grow makes me proud.

I'm proud when Cara tests her blood sugar without me having to telling her to.
I'm proud when Cara doesn't cry or fight at site changes.
I'm proud when Cara does things out of her comfort zone.
I'm proud when Cara learns a new diabetes skill like carb counting.
I'm proud when her siblings support Cara and try to understand what she's going through.
I'm proud when her siblings support Cara in her diabetes care.
I'm so proud when her siblings correct and/or share correct type 1 diabetes knowledge with others.

I'm proud that diabetes is JUST part of our lives, something that we have learned to live with, we have made the adjustments and will continue to make adjustments with this disease. We wake up everyday not letting out battles overcome us...and that is something to be PROUD of! 

Every day, even though there is a lot of yelling and fighting and frustrations and tears there is ALWAYS love and always something to be proud of.    

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Forever And Ever In Our Hearts, Sweet Shamae

A blog no one ever wants to write...

A tribute to an amazing D-mama, who will be missed tremendously.

She was living the D life about 15 months before we entered it, with the diagnoses of her beautiful little girl Sydney.

We met online, but never in person...something now I wish was not the case.

One chance to hug this amazing woman, one chance to see her smile and hear her laughter would mean the world to me.

She was always there to offer advice.

She was always there to offer her love and understanding.

She was there to cheer me on and fight along side me through the ups and downs with this disease for our sweet girls.

I entered this online blogging community of mothers with children with type 1 diabetes really not understanding what I would get out of it.  

What I got out of it was a family of sisters and Shamae was one of them, 

She was one of us.

It's been said she was one of the original "Dmoms" online.  

She seemed to have a knack for finding us...the newbies.

A bit lost, a bit unsure, but not to worry because she was there.

One by one, as we wrote our first blog posts, entering a world of the unknown,

Shamae would be there, reaching out to us, pulling us in with her love and comforting us under her wing.

She was our Angel.

Offering us same-same and building our new family one post at a time.  

Our family is now broken and missing a huge piece with the news of her loss, our dear sister.

And now the family that Shamae helped build is sending all our love, prayers and thoughts to Shamae's husband and her 3 most beautiful little girls. 

There are no words to express how sorry I am for your loss. You will forever be in my heart, thoughts and prayers and a part of our family because I will never, ever forget your amazing mother...forever and ever!

I found this song on Shamae's blog, and it has not left me.  All night and in my dreams this song played.

Another angel looking from above, you are sooooo missed my sweet friend!!

Saturday, October 12, 2013

Thank You For Excepting HER DIABETESNESS

Yes, it's that time of year again when all us AMAZING Canadians take a little time to count our blessings and show our thankfulness for all we have.

It's Canadian Thanksgiving Weekend.

And of course, I have a very long list of greatness to be thankful for:
  • my family
  • our health
  • my friends
  • YOU
  • chocolate
  • wine
  • laughter
But this post, this post has been long over due. This post is about FRIENDS, no, not my friends (love you all), but about Cara's friends.

Cara is soon- to- be 8 years old, I really still can't believe it!  And for a soon- to- be 8 year old, friends are extremely important... as we are learning :) And this girl is one lucky little diabetic, let me tell you!

She is surrounded by amazing friends and their wonderful families...and I'm so so thankful for this!

You know, it's funny, people are so quick to write kids off, but they are some of the most insightful, compassionate, empathetic, smart people in this world.  Seriously, listen to kids talk, they really pick up on things that we adults seem to miss.  

I first noticed this blessing I believe last year, around this time when attending M's Halloween party.  The girls (Cara's classmates) all wanted to play tickle tag and M stopped everyone and said "wait, we can't play that because we might pull Cara's tube off" and my heart melted. No one complained, they just went back to brainstorming games that Cara could play.  Of course, I told M and the girls that her tubing would be fine, so no worries everyone can play tickle tag. 

M and Cara have been inspiring friends, they support each other, they watch out for each other.  They are great together! M almost got her blood sugar taken one day as they were playing Xbox 360.  With their backs towards me, I pulled a hand up in order to take "Cara's" blood sugar and luckily M quickly turned and looked at me like "what the hell are you doing".  We all laughed, a good laugh and moved on and guess what? She still comes over for play that's a true friend!!

Cara's friends don't see Cara any different in a negative way HOWEVER, I do think she gets a little more attention than most of the girls in her class.  The amount of birthday invites she has received this year already proves that!!

Play dates are now becoming a big part of Cara's life and we are very much pushed outside our comfort zone handing over control to our daughter.  But we are doing it, and it is allowing Cara to grow and understand how to better understand her diabetes.  These play dates give her the chance to learn how to express her needs and ask others for help.  On these play dates if anything diabetes comes up, if they are going to eat or if she feels low, she must figure out what to do and when, and if she can't do what she needs, she is learning when and how to ask for help.  These are all things that she would not be learning if she was by my side I would like ;)

I'm so thankful for her friends parents for being brave enough to open their home to Cara.  To take on diabetes care for the hours Cara is with them must be extremely nerve wracking but they do it and they do it so well.

Just today Cara was at her friend A's house.  We dropped her off for a few hour play date which turned into a few hour play date and a trip to the pumpkin patch.  It truly blows my mind what people will do for Cara even with our diabetes life thrown into the mix.

This past June was our 5th year walking for the JDRF and this year Cara really wanted to invite her classmates to the walk.  I thought to myself, ugh, she is going to be so disappointed when no one shows up, but she insisted and so we did.  I was blown away with the response we received, 5 families came out and walked with us that day and another family sent a donation to school for Cara. 

Cara was so excited to have her friends there with us on HER day. 

To feel this support and love by your friends and their families is, well, there is no other word then AMAZING!!  It's amazing that these families are blessing my girl with these memories when it would be so much easier to not invite her or not get involved. There is such a sense of acceptance and understanding and willingness to learn. 

I don't think they truly understand the impact they have on Cara.  It's not just the acceptance and feeling good because you have friends and people who like you...we all need that! But it's so much more.  They are shaping the way Cara views her type 1 diabetes.  I don't think they truly understand how important it is for Cara to feel excepted both for herself and for her diabetes, they are a big part of Cara growing into a well-rounded, confident, HEALTHY young lady with diabetes. 

They are teaching her it's okay to have type 1 diabetes, type 1 diabetes does not affect the way we see you.   Cara doesn't have to hide her diabetes, she doesn't have to keep it a secret, she doesn't feel shamed or judged or even out of place around her friends because they love her and her diabetesness.


Have a wonderful weekend my friends <3