Tuesday, December 20, 2011
I know, I know, I promised to be happy if Cara's A1C was under 10 BUT really...REALLY... 9.9 ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! (go ahead you can laugh, it is kinda funny I guess...9.9) How does that even happen. I guess I can be happy we are finally out of the 10's. ha...ha...ha (that is me laughing at my 9.9 ha)
The A1c was from a finger pick so I'm taking off a few points because I feel that a blood draw A1c is much more accurate. So lets say 9.5 :) That's a little better.
Whatever the number this is not GOOD enough...UGH!
So back to the drawing board and time to change it up a bit. I need to change my mind set. I will admit I have a fear and it is of LOWS.
This is a hard job, too much insulin and your crashing and chasing lows, too little insulin and your child has high blood sugar and high A1c's, each has its own negative and crappy side affects.
This is not as easy as it seems. "Oh (they say) just count the carbs and bolus for them"...easy peasy right?.. "it's just a balancing act between carbs, insulin and exercise" (this is what they told me) REALLY? IS THAT IT? WHATEVER! How am I suppose to accurately balance something I can't see? How in the hell are you ALL doing this?
Imagine walking on a tight rope 25 feet in the air or better yet imagine placing your child on that tight rope and trying to help them navigate the tight rope...with your eyes closed...NOT FUN and GOOD LUCK because you or your child are going to fall. It takes time, it takes knowledge, it takes patience AND maybe a little luck. But you MUST walk this tight rope, as you make your way back up on that rope your getting stronger, your getting smarter, your confidence is growing. Just then, some jack ass thought it would be FUN to manipulated your rope and everything has changed. Now your rope is longer, it is thinner and it is angled!! You will need to make adjustments, you will need to make last second decisions but as long as you don't give up one day you will get there.
One day I will get there...One day! So new plan, we plan to be a little more aggressive, not too sure at this moment what that means or what that will bring but I must get this A1c down. We are also going to start saving for a CGM. Image walking this tight rope with your eyes wide open now you can see when the twist and turns from that jack ass are coming. That is what a CGM (continuous glucose monitor) will do for us and Cara it will open our eyes to what is happening with her blood sugars as it happens. I truly believe this is how we make a huge change in Cara's A1C, this is the way I can get over my fear of lows and feel more confident being more aggressive.
Do you think Cara would be sad if Santa brought her a CGM as her one and only gift? (that damn thing is expensive) Ya, I don't think she would like that too much!!