The Power Of Same

It truly is an amazing thing,

one little post,

a picture

and a comment.

There is so much power in the same. 

It offers safety when you feel threatened.

It gives you faith when you no longer believe.

It allows you to feel courageous when you are scared,

and there is always love when you feel alone.

Seeing someone like you,

same age

 maybe same gender

fighting the same fight

with the same struggles 

because of the same disease.

Some days, it give you just the right amount of push you need.

Others, a little insight that you may have been missing.

We celebrate the triumphs and we morn the losses. 

It is unconditional acceptance and understanding.

YOU GET IT!

To have these connections with people like you,

on this blog and facebook

IS TRULY ASTOUNDING

We laugh together,

Cry together,

support each other,

we love each other.

 All this, because of a simple comment,
a "like"
a status update
or a little yellow smiley face.

Even though we have never met we are the same.

 

 We are family.

Tonight I saw the power of same in action.  Cara was able to do something that has long been a NO GO.  A leg site. Something so small but something so important. This was the first time in a long time EVER that I was actually excited to do a site change.

All because Cara was able to see one little picture 

of one amazing brave girl,

who used the same infusion sets.

She found the courage to go for it

and we did a leg site.

"if she can do it WE can do it"

SAME

AND WE DID IT!!

When I posted this picture on facebook Cara sat and read all the comments with the biggest, most amazing smile on her face.  You made her feel loved,
you made her feel proud,
you made her feel so so special...THANK YOU!!

There are no words to express what I'm feeling right now.

THANK YOU

Thank you Kelly at Type 1 SweetHarp and brave, brave Brianna for sharing the picture of your thigh leg site.

and a huge THANK YOU to Wendy at Candy Hearts Blog for making and posting this...

Cara feels so loved right now, it's amazing.  She is glowing!

 

The D.O.C, my facebook family...you guys ROCK!!

Our hearts are so full.

What in the B.G. just happened!

What in the hell happened last night?

This was my reaction upon waking up to an extremely thirst and bathroom needy Cara.

Last night I was rocking the bg's...like a pro!

Bedtime number, beautiful

Midnight number, amazing 6.2mmols

2:00am number... HOLLA can I get a WOO WOO 6.6mmols!

But at some point something went terribly wrong and I have no clue what or when because:
1. I have NO fricken CGM to tell me exactly what in the world is happening with bg so it is a guessing game.
2. I don't even know if what I thought happened really did happen.

Allow me to explain:

I checked bg at midnight, 6.2 mmols so I told my husband to set a 2 O'clock just to make sure she was steady. Her night time basal has been dead on lately or I would have turned it down a bit with a slight temp basal. Looking back, maybe I should have set that damn temp after all? Or maybe it was a site issue? No clue, but all I was thinking about was how nice a whole night of 6's were going to help with our A1C.

DAMN A1C I blame you!!

At 2 O'clock the alarm went off and I jumped out of bed.  I jumped so quickly out of bed that it woke my husband.  I told him to shut off the alarm. I walked into Cody's room (Cara was having a sleep over) and dug her arm out from under the Toy Story tent. I Took her bg and 6.6mmols popped onto the screen, and with a smile and a yes I'm awesome, I went back to bed relaying the 6.6 to my husband.

This morning Cara walked into our room "Mom, I'm thirsty and really have to go to the bathroom" Well, that is never good! I took Cara's bg and 17.9mmols.

What the hell happened? I started to flip through her meter to remind myself of her previous numbers and as I did I noticed that something was missing.  There was no 6.6 from 2:00 recorded on her meter.  I KNOW that I got up, I know that I took her blood sugar and I know that it said 6.6mmols.  But why did it not record on her meter? So weird, had I dreamt the blood sugar check? No, no there was no way, is there?

I still have no clue what happened.  At first I was thinking she may have gone low during the night after my 2am bg check and it was a rebound high, however an early morning site change was in order because Cara's blood sugar was not going down and her reservoir smelt strongly like insulin? So maybe a pump/site issue? 

No matter what it was I keep thinking how wonderful it would be if we had a CGM!! At least I would have a better idea of what the hell went on last night!

Still can't figure out if I REALLY did the 2am bg check, but I know I did...so strange!
 
  

The Next 48

48 Questions: Getting to Know Me, Nicole

 DSMA suggested the DOC get to know each other better by answering these 48 questions. After seeing Meri from Our Diabetic Life and Kathy from Bigfoot Child Have Diabetes doing it, I wanted to do it too! I'm a bit of a follower... 

1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?

Nope, I don't think so?  However, I have an older 2nd cousin named Nicole and growing up she was BIG Nicole and I was little Nicole :)

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED?

A few days ago.  I DVR Parenthood because my husband doesn't like to watch it with me.  The kids were gone to school, my husband was at work and I was done my "chores" so I watched 3 episodes and cried and cried and cried...happy and sad tears, I love/hate that show!

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?

NOOO, HATE IT!! I make my husband fill out forms or write the teacher notes, that is how much I hate it!

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT?

Turkey 

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS?

Ha,ha,ha YEP! Sure do...6!! Four girls and 2 boys

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?

For sure, 100%...I'm a party!!

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT?

Depends on who I'm talking to. For the most part...Ah, ya!

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS?

Yep and is it weird that I'm proud of that fact?!?!

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP?

Yes (remember... Par-TAY, right here!)  however it would be more like bungee falling because someone would have to literally push me off the ledge, no way I would be able to JUMP!

 

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL?

Cinnamon Toast Crunch

 

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?

Nope, but I do untie them when I putting them on.

.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG?

Yes, I can kick your ass...if that is what you're asking!  And I WILL if you mess with my kids.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM?

New York Cherry Cheese Cake

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE?

Maybe, their teeth?

15. RED OR PINK?

Pink

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF?

I'm dyslexic and I would be such an awesomer me without it; so being dyslexic, least favorite thing!

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST?

My pets that have passed, I guess? They just don't live long enough :(

18. WHAT IS THE TECHNIQUE THAT YOU NEED TO WORK ON THE MOST?

reading, spelling and grammar...I'm serious, see #16.  

 

19. WHAT COLOR SHOES ARE YOU WEARING?

No shoes allowed in the house!  I'm wearing light grey socks with red, pink, orange and dark grey stripes.
 

20. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE?

A bowl of Honey-Combs and milk.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?

Jimmy Two Shoes on the t.v. and Wow Wow Wubbzy (Nick Jr) on the computer.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE?

 Purple...it's fun!

23. FAVORITE SMELLS?

The smell of baking.

24. HOW IMPORTANT ARE YOUR POLITICAL VIEWS TO YOU?

Not very, they screw everything up anyways...

25. MOUNTAIN HIDEAWAY OR BEACH HOUSE?

Mountain Hideaway = perfection!

26. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH?

Ok, so, my husband and I started sport betting with Pro-line and I so enjoyed watching football and cheering for MY picks. Side note: My husband actually got a perfect card once, unfortunately so did like thousands of others and his split was about $260.

27. HAIR COLOR?

Dark brown with every growing highlights of grey...just beautiful! ;)

28. EYE COLOR?

brownish

29. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS?

Nope, but I do have glasses.  I only wear them for driving or in situation that I want to see from a far distance.

30. FAVORITE FOOD?

Oh, this is a tough one, I love to eat and I love food...I guess I would say anything pasta and cheesy.

 

31. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS?

I'm very "complex"when it comes to movies.  I don't watch anything haunting because I believe in ghosts and hauntings, I can't watch anything were dogs die (too sad) or children are kidnapped (too much anxiety) I HATE B.S. drama's (eye roll).  I'm going with action, suspense with a dose of happy endings.

  

32. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED?

Chronicles? I think that is what it was called? I'm not much for going to the theater, a lot of our movies are off of Netflix.
 

33. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING?

Do you mean colour? (hehehe Canadian humour, hehehe and did it again!!) it's GREY

34. SUMMER OR WINTER?

Summer, a few years ago I would have said winter.

35. FAVORITE DESSERT?

dessert...any kind!

36. STRENGTH TRAINING OR CARDIO?

Cardio! and I'm working hard on trying to get my fat ass out there to do some.

37. COMPUTER OR TELEVISION?

Computer, it's where my friends are.

38. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW?

Awe, now you're making me feel bad :( I'm not reading a book right now. BUT it is on my list of things to do in order to better myself just like #36.

39. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD?

no mouse pad, laptop.

40. FAVORITE SOUND?

Nothing is better then the sound of a laughing baby.

41. FAVORITE GENRE OF MUSIC?

Dance music, I love to dance.

42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME?

 Las Vegas 

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT?

Not really?? Again with the making me feel bad :( WTH?

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?

Here 

45. WHERE ARE YOU LIVING NOW?

Still here.

46. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR HOUSE?

 This questions makes me smile because my house is GOLD right now, like crazy gold and wallpaper everywhere even on the ceilings.  That is going to change very soon! I have to get painting.

47. WHAT COLOR IS YOUR CAR?

I have 6 kids, I don't have a car...our "bus" is white.

48. DO YOU LIKE ANSWERING 48 QUESTIONS?

Yes, it was fun. I would have stopped half way if I did not like it.

And now it's your turn,  get your 48 questions on.

Christmas = Lots Of Pictures For You Now And To Come!

For Christmas I got a new phone, no tablet...no I think it's a phone.  Anyways I'm just starting to learn this amazing piece of technology that is the Samsung Galaxy Note 2 and that is going to mean a lot more pictures on this blog, facebook and now instagram...so fun!

Sleepovers...the older Cara gets the closer she gets to the dreaded sleepover.  Really, I know we will find some way of making this work, other moms/dads have done it and I will too.  HOLY SHIT that is going to take a lot out of me!! But for now sleepover nights with siblings will do :) Cara is happy and so is mommy.

 

What is leftover from a site change. 

 

I don't know where you guys keep your t1d supplies but we keep the ones we will/may need at anytime during the day in our "diabetes bowl" that sits on our kitchen island.  

 

You got mail.  Never in my life would I think I would be so happy to see medical supplies delivered to my house. It is a weird life this diabetes life.

 

 

OK, I have a confession...it's bad, really bad...I know and I NEVER want Cara to feel this way about diabetes and food...I'm sure she will BUT the longer we live with D the less patience I have figuring out fricken carbs.  Can I tell you something?  I HATE TO COUNT CARBS! There I said it...I would rather do a site change (sorry Cara) BUT O.M.G....I find it soooo agonizing. I find myself rolling my eyes when she wants snacks that I have to pull out the scale to weigh (like this f'in chips).  Can't you just pick something that is package with carb counts marked...help a mom out here kid!! I know, I know I MUST change my attitude but it's the truth!    

 

Now this made me laugh so I had to take a pic.  I had just finished my morning coffee and snack (some bake good) and I looked down at my plate and there it was... a test strip out of no where.. I felt like I was the diabetic.  

 

OK here is a lesson for you all.  Make sure to wash your hands before testing especially after previously eating skittles. A 19.9mmols really was a 7.8mmols...Good thing the 19.9 did not make sense and I questioned it. p.s. the time on the meters...I still have not changed it from daylight savings...trust me I know...

 

 

The bottom of my washing machine. A sticker off of Cara's pump! 

 

Decembers student of the month for Caring and Compassion...Super proud of this kid!! 

 

 And yet another food complaining pic...How damn hard is it to actually give me the serving size? NOT 1/5 of the package.  What the hell does that mean? Now I need to figure out just how many soft taco's are actually in the package, figure out what the hell 1/5 of the package works out to (btw I HATE MATH) and then start the rest of my "normal" diabetes dinner math (So if little girl Cara eats this many tacos and 1/5 of the taco's is BLANK minus the fiber...how many carbs did little Cara eat? NONE!! because little Cara's mom got so mad at all the math she threw the damn dinner out and made something that was properly marked (not really, but you get what I'm saying). BTW 1/5 is the same as SAYING 2...TWO FRICKEN SOFT TACO'S!!  THANKS OLD EL PASO...SHIT!!

 

A Trip Away Before A Birthday

A few days after WDD it got a little cray, cray around here.

I skipped out on my family for a much needed vacation....and where does a mom of 6 head to when they need a break?? Well, Vegas of course!!

Yes, yes, yes...I DID!!

Let me tell you I could have used 5 days of relaxing/sleeping on a beach, with a few added sex on the beach (the DRINK people the drink) or any other sexy beach named drinks BUT instead it was party time...I'm youngish, I can still hang!!

I had a wonderful time with 2 of my girlfriends, seeing the sites, walking the strip, taking in the shows and lights.  We went to the Grand Canyon on a 15 hour bus tour...amazing fun (the bus part) and amazingly beautiful (the Canyon), we saw the Hoover Dam, Route 66 and a little town that the Disney·Pixar movie Cars was based on called Seligman, we went out and partied it up and I had a wonderful D meet up with Alexis from Chronicles of D-Boy and Ribbon, a major HIGHLIGHT of my trip!! We shot some guns...a first for this Canadian!! AND THAT WAS FUN! We ate and ate until we could not eat anymore.

It was a wonderful time, I was not living my life in 2 hour segments.  No counting carbs, no dealing with highs or lows, no calls from the school, no site changes and the best of all NO NIGHT TIME BG CHECKS...but shhhh I was up most nights at that time still...HOLLA!!  I would lie if I said it was not KILLING ME not knowing what Cara's bg was at all times however by the end of the trip I had that panicky "oh I hope my husband does not kill my daughter" feeling under control, you know the one? Right?. (that's a joke...I knew he could do it...right?)

I left Thursday afternoon and came home on the red eye Tuesday morning to the craziness that is my house in the early morning and of course... a site change. 

Word to the wise...red eyes are killers!! I felt like I was going to puke all day.  Poor Kirstin and Cody where home from school that day and lets just say I'm so thankful for leftover Halloween candy and T.V. Yep....it's the truth.  I was dieing!!

It was a great time spending time with myself...not as mom....not as wife....not as type 1 nurse....but ME...Nicole...an older, much more tired, more lived me then I remember, but I'm still here, I still exists and that was nice to see.  We get so lost some days, sometimes there is just nothing left...you lose yourself in your kids, your husband, diabetes...life! and no sleep... but underneath it all we still exist!! It's a great feeling to peel away at the layers and be able to find yourself again. The break was amazing and NEEDED!!

Where we stayed :) At the very end of the Strip lol At least we got a lot of walking in and learned bus routes very fast!

Reminded me of the DOC <3

There was something about this damn Pelican...I have 20 pics of him!! #fellinlove

The lights, the music, the amaziness...smiles and nothing else while watching it EVERYTIME!! #lovedit!

Ok, our hotel hallway, every night we would come home I would picture those two scary twins at the end of the hallway "Come Play with us Nicole for ever and ever and ever...HELP!!

The Damn...Hoover Dam

Fremont Street...LOVED!!

Mater..on route 66

for a special someone you might all know her Meri <3

I love the single tree just hanging out taking in the view...

#peace #heavenly Whatever you want to call it...NO WORDS

WAY TO MUCH FUN!!

The D mom meet up...shit pic (of me) but had to share <3 Lexi and her family are AMAZE- ZING!! LOVE THEM!!

After I got home it was MAJOR cleaning time and party planning mode.

Before I left I had sent out invites to all Cara's GIRL classmates.  I was under strict orders only the girls in the class were to be invited to her 7th birthday party...no stinky boys!! 

Saturday was the big day and by Friday I still had no idea what "theme" I was going with.  Cara said something about Littlest Pet Shop but how in the hell do you base a whole party around weird big bobble headed tiny toy animals...so I was stuck.  And then it hit me a Christmas Birthday Party, it was November 24th after all and we needed to put up the decoration for Christmas soon anyways.  Perfect, we ran with it! For crafts we can decorate Christmas cookies and ornaments to take home...DONE!!

Cara got dressed in her Christmas best, Christmas trees went up and all decorations where assigned their places.  We got clear Christmas bulb ornaments, lots of paints, sparkles and pearl sticky balls.

Cara had a fabulous 7th birthday party.  T1D was far in the back of our minds.  She was scheduled for a site change that day however she got away with going a day longer.  "But mom" she said "I don't want to do site change on my birthday" with the biggest saddest desperate look on her face totally knowing that I would fall for that.  Alright, site change tomorrow morning (I'm a sucker for her big deer eyes and she knows it)

One of her little friends gave her a card that read Today is your birthday (open the card) Hope it's a treat because you're a girl who's especially sweet! I giggled and a huge smile grew at her reading that because it was the perfect birthday card for my especially sweet little girl (who's not that little any longer...tear) I wonder if they (the birthday card buyers did this on purpose?? Either way I thought it was SWEET ;) and it made me laugh at D and that's always a great feeling!!          

SOOO who's in for another Vegas trip??